JESUS the WOKE LIBERAL

JESUS the WOKE LIBERAL

Hey MAGA Christians! Be like Jesus.

By Keith Thomas

2/16/2025

“If you would be perfect, go, sell what you possess and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and come, follow me.”

Street Jesus.

The Christian Jesus was a knock-me-down, full-blown, save-kitty-from-the-tree-being-hugged, give-all-your-money-away, turn-the-other-cheek, bleeding-heart LIBERAL! He was single and never dated. Hung out with guys. Lived in a commune. Told people to get rid of their possessions.[1] Died penniless.

The New Testament cannot be preached without presenting the LIBERAL view of Jesus unless you’re a Christian Nationalist MAGA. Well, it can be but it won’t be an accurate representation. Jesus put love and caring for the poor, the sick, the downtrodden, the infirm, the immigrant first. Jesus put Love first.

Jesus hung out with the wretched dregs of society. Wretched dregs like MAGA. He would have tried to get them to be better people. He did NOT preach a prosperity gospel. He never said a word against gay people. NOT. ONE. WORD. He wasn’t a racist. He didn’t discriminate. He walked everywhere most of the time. Well, there was that donkey that he rode once.

I’m talking about Jesus.

There’s all that Beatitudes scripture just full of liberal pronouncements. I’m not going to even bother with listing all those far-out pronouncements of a LIBERAL mentality.

Not a good businessman!

DEI Jesus.

Jesus was all about DEI! He lived DEI! He promoted DEI!

Jesus was biased. He said some off the wall Liberal stuff and did some really liberal things. He fed 5,000 people and didn’t charge for the meal! Seriously. Didn’t even ask for donations. Didn’t hawk hats.

His church wasn’t a profit center. Okay, he really didn’t have a physical church home so this may not be a fair comparison. There were people meeting in buildings though, helping getting Christianity off the ground.

He wasn’t a profit center. He had his apostle followers just walk off the job without any increase in monetary benefits. He didn’t say, “Follow me and you’ll make a lot of money and I’ll even throw in medical!” He didn’t even have sense enough to charge for bringing back the dead or miraculously healing people. Can you imagine? With a talent like that he could have made a fortune.

As near as I can tell he didn’t even have any extra robes to wear. He just walked around and stayed places. What did he do with his income anyway? He sure didn’t spend it on clothes or shoes. He did seem to eat out a lot. I just can’t see him picking up the check though. He did have that creating food out of thin air talent.

The man really did not know how to make a buck even though he was into marketing. He was into busting up the temple franchising though. So there’s that at least.

Jesus did talk about those with wealth.

“It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God." Jesus said that.

The people listed below did NOT get that memo!

Big Bible Business

“So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple.” Jesus[2]

            Teaching Christians all about Jesus and the bible can be pretty lucrative for some people. They prey on the same kind of gullible people that MAGA preys on. Average financially middle-class church pastors are NOT living high on the hog.

Estimated worth.[3]

1 Kenneth Copeland, $300 million.

2 Dave Ramsey, 200 + million.

3 Pat Robertson, $100 million. (Deceased)

4 Joel Osteen, $100 million.[4]

5 Benny Hinn, $60 million

6 Steven Furtick Jr., $55 million.[5]

7 Andy Stanely, $45 million

8 Creflo Dollar, $30 million

9 Rick Warren, $25 million. (Warren was in the news recently for posting that Jesus would be a centrist politically.[6] That pissed off a couple million Christians and he took his post down.)

10 Jesse Duplantis, $20 million (Deceased. Died in private plane crash in ’24.)

11 T.D. Jakes, $20 million

12 Greg Laurie, $15 million

13 Jim Bakker, $15 million.[7] (Bakker crashed and burned once. Spent 5 years in prison and was paroled. BTW in addition to all his other criminal charges he was also accused of raping a drugged woman and paying her off.[8] Since being released he has clawed his way back once again and tapped into the MAGA crowd.)

14 John F. MacArthur, $14 million

15 Franklin Graham, $10 million

16 John C. Maxwell, $10 million

17 Joyce Meyer, $8 million

18 Paula White, $6 million[9]

“No one can serve two masters, for either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and money.” Jesus

And Trump.

MJGA

You know what would really help the MAGA Christian Nationalists that put together Project 2025 to serve their master Trump? Paying attention to what Jesus said and did.

Think about what Jesus would say and do during difficult times like these. He lived in some difficult times. They did him in. Politicians and religious leaders like those surrounding and supporting Trump got him. God did use some unsavory people. But when he used them, when they found a higher purpose—they changed! They became better people. They treated their fellow human beings better.

The Pharisees of today are trying to tell us that the tweet storming name calling petty grudge having lying pathetic caricature of a man is God’s Chosen One and is being used by God to serve a greater purpose. If you believe in such nonsense then you should recognize that God sent a plague to the man you worship and crashed the nation in 2020. Then in 2024 MAGA Christians voted for him again. They didn’t get the message.

Biblical Jesus lived as a common man. He had grace and eloquence under pressure. He was fair. He was just. He said and lived a better way. He wasn’t a racist. He would not think it a good idea to separate families and put children in cages. Jesus would not be claiming that he had a Constitutional right to endanger and kill people. He would not be a multi-millionaire. He would more than likely have a street ministry and be taking care of the poor and homeless. He wouldn’t be telling people to give their money to millionaires and billionaires. Jesus would be saying feed the hungry and he would not be saying BUT only if they have the right papers. Jesus is a globalist. Jesus is a Universalist. Jesus was all about DEI.

Make Jesus Great Again.

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[1] https://www.openbible.info/topics/leave_your_worldly_possessions_behind

[2] Ibid.

[3] https://www.legit.ng/ask-legit/top/1627219-top-richest-pastors-america-impressive-net-worth/

[4] https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/joel-osteen-shooting-church-shooter-b2494689.html

[5] https://www.christianity.com/wiki/people/steven-furtick.html

[6] https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/opinion/rick-warren-deletes-political-tweet-about-crucifixion-after-christian-backlash/ar-AA1z8DxA?ocid=winp1taskbar&cvid=44f625eb8bfd452cbbf5f802936e4f82&ei=45

[7] https://equityatlas.org/what-is-jim-bakker-net-worth/#

[8] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Bakker

[9] https://coblitob.com/paula-white-net-worth/

Copyright © 2025 Keith Thomas. All Rights Reserved